Despite putting a notice on my ads that I only will deal face-to-face, and for cash only, I still get bombarded with calls/texts. Lately some RV Broker in California has called me like 10 times saying they have multiple buyers interested in my unit. I told them send them my way, but they said "we don't work like that" and started spouting crap about "escrow this" and "retainer that". After being polite too many times and asking them to stop the calls and texts, the only way to stop them was to cuss them out using the vast breadth and depth of my reservoir of profanity. (FYI, I was taught profanity by the master, and can even invoke some Russian if need be...)
I have since started including this language in my craiglist ads. I'm actually hoping someone will violate this, I am anxious to see if I can make it stick.
ATTENTION! I DO NOT DESIRE ANY HELP SELLING THIS ITEM! ALL CALLS, EMAILS OR TEXTS BY ANY COMMERCIAL ENTITY WITH AN OFFER HELP IN SELLING THIS ITEM ARE UNWELCOME. ANY BROKERAGE OR OTHER COMMERCIAL ENTITY CALLING ABOUT THIS ITEM WILL BE CHARGED $500.00 PER CALL. BY PLACING A CALL EITHER PERSONALLY, OR AUTOMATICALLY, YOU AGREE TO THIS CONDITION AND FURTHERMORE AGREE TO PAY ALL CHARGES WITHIN 30 DAYS OF THE DATE OF THE CALL.
Listen up Sucker! This is a LEGALLY BINDING contract, so if you are a broker or other commercial entity and call me, I will get in your pockets. Go ahead and try me.