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Old 01-02-2014, 02:07 PM   #1
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Accident Reporting Form



Dear Sir,

I am writing in respose to your request for additional information in block #3, of the Accident Reporting Form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident.

You said in your letter that I must explain more fully and I trust that the following details should be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new, six-story building. When I completed my work, I discovered that I had about 500 pounds of brick left over. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel, by using a pully, which fortunately, was attached to the side of the building, at the 6th floor.

Securing the rope at the ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out, and loaded the brick into it. Then I went back to the ground and untied the rope, holding it tightly to insure a slow descent, of the 500 pounds of brick. You will note in block #11 of the Accident Reporting Form, that I weigh 185 pounds.

Due to my suprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate, up the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the 3rd floor, I met the barrel coming down. This explains the fractured skull and broken collarbone.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pully.

Fortunately, by this time, I had regained my presence of mind, and was ale to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of my pain.

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Devoid of the weight of the bricks, the barrel now weighed approximately 50 pounds.

I refer you again to my weight in block #11. As you might imagine, I began a rapid decent, down the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the 3rd floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the 2 fractured ankles and the lacerations of my legs and lower body.

The encounter with the barrel, slowed me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell onto the pile of bricks, and fortunately, only 3 vertabrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay there on the bricks, in pain, unable to stand, and watching the empty barrel 6 stories above, I again lost my presence of mind.....AND LET GO OF THE ROPE!

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Old 01-02-2014, 02:25 PM   #2
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OK, you even made the DH *snort* when I read that to 'im.

His snort made me laugh, my laugh made him laugh and snort more, which made me laugh even harder.

Thanks for one of those laughs that does the soul good.
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Old 01-02-2014, 02:32 PM   #3
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I love it!

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Old 01-02-2014, 02:34 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by f1100turbo View Post
I love it!

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OK, that signature line made *me* snort!

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Old 01-02-2014, 03:02 PM   #5
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Ok, that signature line made *me* snort!

:d


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Old 01-02-2014, 03:52 PM   #6
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I hope that's not a true story

I have to wonder what a bricklayer is doing working on the roof of a building though.
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Old 01-02-2014, 04:25 PM   #7
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HAHA - sounds almost like the plot for a roadrunner cartoon!
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Old 01-02-2014, 04:44 PM   #8
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Have not heard that one in a while, it never loses it's punch though. Very good.
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Old 01-02-2014, 04:49 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by b47 View Post
i hope that's not a true story

I have to wonder what a bricklayer is doing working on the roof of a building though.
fireplace repair?
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Old 01-02-2014, 04:58 PM   #10
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fireplace repair?
Yeah - could be a chimney /fireplace repair,but the joke doesn't need to go into that much detail. It's still a good one.
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Old 01-02-2014, 06:31 PM   #11
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Saw Myth Busters do a show on this story to see if it was really possible. Didn't quite work for them.
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Old 01-02-2014, 06:40 PM   #12
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You need to quit dozing off in that warm Florida sun- already been covered by Iwannacamp in post #9 earlier while you were sleeping.
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Old 01-02-2014, 06:43 PM   #13
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You need to quit dozing off in that warm Florida sun- already been covered by Iwannacamp in post #9 earlier while you were sleeping.
You also must be dozing also, already deleted it. DUH!
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Old 01-02-2014, 06:45 PM   #14
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You also must be dozing also, already deleted it. DUH!
See how fast I am

Glad you explained though - I was looking for your reply and couldn't find it
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Old 01-03-2014, 12:25 PM   #15
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Inquiring minds....

Getting a jump on spring cleaning, I recently came across an old 3 ring binder, that was full of OLD jokes. I'm talking OLD.....like back in the 70's and early 80's. Rembmber when you went to work and someone was passing around xeroxed jokes.....most of them nasty!

This was before Internet, before cell phones, before YouTube, before Vining, before "Selfing", before modern forms of communication......back in the Stone Ages when life was alot slower.

But I find that HUMOR never gets old, so I am sharing. I don't know of anyone that doesn't need a laugh, do you?
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Old 01-03-2014, 12:58 PM   #16
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Funny thing about that joke is I know a few people who are about that smart!!!!
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