Blonde jokes

[wmtire]

I'm not saying my blonde girlfriend is dense, but she thinks Iran is an Apple treadmill machine.

[Platokidd]

Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?"
Brunette: "I don’t know."
Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!"

[Platokidd]

A guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes..."

[ImQAJack]

For those who travel, often the best food is a truck stop.
I wonder what the waitress would have to say if someone actually ordered their breakfast as this guy did?
A trucker came into a Truck Stop Cafe' and placed his order. He said , "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards." The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards.
What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?"
'No,' the cook said. 'Three flat tires... mean three pancakes; a pair of headlights... is two eggs sunny side up; and a pair of running boards... are 2 slices of crisp bacon.
'Oh... OK!' said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.
The trucker asked, 'What are the beans for, Blondie?'
(I love this one...! )
She replied, 'I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!
FOR ONCE THE BLONDE GETS EVEN!!!!!

[TitanMike]

Originally Posted by ImQAJack

For those who travel, often the best food is a truck stop.
I wonder what the waitress would have to say if someone actually ordered their breakfast as this guy did?
A trucker came into a Truck Stop Cafe' and placed his order. He said , "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards." The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards.
What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?"
'No,' the cook said. 'Three flat tires... mean three pancakes; a pair of headlights... is two eggs sunny side up; and a pair of running boards... are 2 slices of crisp bacon.
'Oh... OK!' said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.
The trucker asked, 'What are the beans for, Blondie?'
(I love this one...! )
She replied, 'I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!
FOR ONCE THE BLONDE GETS EVEN!!!!!

Just goes to show that not all dumbs are blonde.


BTW I never told blonde jokes around my wife. She was blonde and I knew that eventually I would have to sleep. Nothing creates more fear in your life than the image in your mind of a PO'd wife in the middle of the night approaching the bed with a frying pan while you're sound asleep.

Chuck Norris once made that statement when he was asked by a reporter if he feared his wife who was also skilled in the martial arts.

[pgandw]

Way too many women took note of Lorena Bobbit got back at her husband. I fear a knife more than I do a frying pan.

[SecretSquirrel]

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chips cookies?

Three. One to stir the batter and two to peel the M&Ms.

[SecretSquirrel]

Did you hear they are finally putting cars headlight dimmer switch back on the floor? Too many blondes getting their foot stuck in the steering wheel.