Chuck Norris again...

[Iwannacamp]

Chuck Norris can beat a royal flush with 2 cards.


Sent from my iPhone using Forest River Forums

[Iwannacamp]

Neil Armstrong was the first to walk on the moon. Chuck Norris was the first to walk on the Sun.


Sent from my iPhone using Forest River Forums

[Wiscampsin]

So that's how he got his tan

[Rugged Brown]

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone

[Rugged Brown]

Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the s*** out of it

[Wiscampsin]

Chuck Norris makes 'the most interesting man in the world' look boring.

[mud yapster]

He's a John Wayne want a be

[53jimc]

Ok, just a few:

When Alexander Bell invented the telephone, he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris.

There used to be a street named Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

[Cowracer]

chuck norris was born in a house he built with his own bare hands.

Tim

[Carrier]

Originally Posted by mud yapster

He's a John Wayne want a be

[themounties]

Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups, he pushes the world down.

[asquared]

Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead, it's just afraid to move.

The original name for Alien vs predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after production began because nobody would pay $9 to see a movie 14 seconds long.


Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

[wmtire]

Chuck Norris can make apple juice with oranges.

America didn't win the American Revolution. Chuck Norris beat the British by himself, Drunk.

Chuck Norris can hit a homerun with a toothpick.

Chuck Norris has braille on his boots so even blind people know when it's coming.

Mike Tyson chipped a tooth on Chuck Norris' ear.

Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

Chuck Norris won the NBA 3 point competition with his hands in his pockets.

Chuck Norris once sold eBay to eBay on eBay.

There is only one safe place to hide from Chuck Norris.. in a bodybag.

Chuck Norris gives the sun cancer.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a horse in the jaw....... Its descendants are now known as giraffes.


Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky

[jwedell]

Chuck Norris is so bad Heaven Don't Want Him
And Hell's Afraid He'll Take Over.


Started Out With Nothing,
Still Have Most Of It Left!

[rana]

Originally Posted by Carrier

Really want to steal this one.

[Arefbee]

[QUOTE=Iwannacamp;684790]Neil Armstrong was the first to walk on the moon. Chuck Norris was the first to walk on the Sun.

Yes, but he went there at night!

[indybp57]

Bigfoot takes blurry pictures of Chuck Norris.

[RhoZeta]

OORAH!

[Brandhans]

Our favorites:
Chuck Norris can cut through a knife with butter.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity-twice
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding all the time.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris starts his fires by rubbing icicles together.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.


Sent from my iPhone using Forest River Forums

[wmtire]

Chuck Norris was dropped twice as a baby.
Once on Hiroshima and once on Nagasaki.