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Old 01-09-2013, 04:29 PM   #1
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 11,045
Happy camping advice

I've seen some of these before, but others were new to me.

To be a happy camper, remember:

- A tuba placed on your picnic table will keep campsites on either side vacant.

- A hot rock placed in your sleeping bag will keep your feet warm, but eating a hot enchilada works just as well and is less dangerous.

- You can compress the diameter of your rolled-up sleeping bag by running over it with your car.

- A two-man pup tent should not be used either by two men or a pup.

- A potato baked in coals for an hour makes a good meal. One baked for three hours makes a good hockey puck.

- In emergency situations, you can survive by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic in your underwear.

- A large carp can be used for a pillow.

- You can get even with a bear who steals your food by going to his favorite stump and eating the ants.

- The guitar of a noisy teenager makes excellent kindling.

- You can duplicate the warmth of a down-filled bedroll by climbing into a garbage bag with two geese.

- You'll never get lost if you remember that moss always grows on the north side of your compass.

- Bear bells are convenient for campers in grizzly country. (The tricky part is getting them on the bears.)

I love camping. You havenít lived until youíve cut your way out of a sleeping bag with a Swiss army knife.

An "RV" is a "home away from home." In other words, nobody is gonna make your bed for you.

2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS

I used to be addicted to time travel, but that's all in the past now.
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Old 01-09-2013, 05:17 PM   #2
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