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Old 07-15-2013, 01:33 PM   #1
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Herk's recent hospital stay

Herk was a pretty sick old man. One week he was sick and in the hospital. There was one nurse that just drove him crazy. Every time she came in, she would talk to him like he was a little child. She would say in a patronizing tone of voice, 'And how are we doing this morning?' Or 'Are we ready for a bath', or 'Are we hungry ?' Old Herk had had enough of this particular nurse. One day, at breakfast, he took the apple juice off the tray and put it in his bed side stand. Later, he was given a urine bottle to fill for testing. So you know where the juice went! The nurse came in a little later, picked up the urine bottle and looked at it. 'My, it seems we are a little cloudy today.'
At this, old Herk snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and drank it down, saying, 'Well, I'll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time.'

The nurse fainted..........

Herk just smiled.
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Old 07-15-2013, 01:44 PM   #2
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Herk was a pretty sick old man. One week he was sick and in the hospital. There was one nurse that just drove him crazy. Every time she came in, she would talk to him like he was a little child. She would say in a patronizing tone of voice, 'And how are we doing this morning?' Or 'Are we ready for a bath', or 'Are we hungry ?' Old Herk had had enough of this particular nurse. One day, at breakfast, he took the apple juice off the tray and put it in his bed side stand. Later, he was given a urine bottle to fill for testing. So you know where the juice went! The nurse came in a little later, picked up the urine bottle and looked at it. 'My, it seems we are a little cloudy today.'
At this, odd Herk snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and drank it down, saying, 'Well, I'll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time.'

The nurse fainted..........

Herk just smiled.
Now that's a good one. Glad your going to be there this year Herk. I for one need to shake your hand and make your acquaintance. OldCoot careful he might get you for this one..
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Old 07-15-2013, 01:45 PM   #3
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Haven't read the joke yet, but I can tell you- sure made my stomach drop a little to see "Herk's recent hospital stay" in the "Recent Discussions" list on the left. It had me worried for a moment.
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Old 07-15-2013, 01:59 PM   #4
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I would have a battle of wits with Old Coot; but it would be like fighting with a one armed man...
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Old 07-15-2013, 02:13 PM   #5
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When I was in hospital a nurse gave me that "are we ready for a bath" routine. My reply was "sure, go ahead and get undressed and I'll do your back." Elderly nurse... no sense of humor!
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Old 07-15-2013, 02:14 PM   #6
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I would have a battle of wits with Old Coot; but it would be like fighting with a one armed man...
Or maybe with an unarmed man!
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Old 07-15-2013, 02:21 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by herk7769 View Post
I would have a battle of wits with Old Coot; but it would be like fighting with a one armed man...
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Old 07-15-2013, 02:32 PM   #8
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Or maybe with an unarmed man!
Like this better.

No such thing as a "fair fight."
You are either there to win by any means or you should run away.
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Old 07-15-2013, 02:37 PM   #9
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Like this better.

No such thing as a "fair fight."
You are either there to win by any means or you should run away.
Just give me 10 seconds and 3 days head start so I can get away in my wheel chair.
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Old 07-15-2013, 02:38 PM   #10
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You guys are killing me with these posts today.
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