McDonnell Douglas joke

[wmtire]

McDonnell Douglas Corp. Warranty

Supposedly, this was actually posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas website by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of course, does not - and made the web department take it down immediately (McDonnell Douglas, now part of Boeing, is one of the world's chief suppliers of military aircraft).
Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires.

1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Col. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other
   First Name: .................................................. ....
   Initial: ........
   Last Name: .................................................. ....
   Password: .............................. (max 8 char)
   Code Name: .................................................. ....
   Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: ........... ........... ..........
2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
   [_] F-14 Tomcat
   [_] F-15 Eagle
   [_] F-16 Falcon
   [_] F-117A Stealth
   [_] Classified
3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): .... /..../....
4. Serial Number: .................................................
5. Please check where this product was purchased:
   [_] Received as gift / aid package
   [_] Catalog showroom
   [_] Independent arms broker
   [_] Mail order
   [_] Discount store
   [_] Government surplus
   [_] Classified
6. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased:
   [_] Heard loud noise, looked up
   [_] Store display
   [_] Espionage
   [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally
   [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
   [_] Was attacked by one
7. Please check the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
   [_] Style / appearance
   [_] Speed / maneuverability
   [_] Price / value
   [_] Comfort / convenience
   [_] Kickback / bribe
   [_] Recommended by salesperson
   [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
   [_] Advanced Weapons Systems
   [_] Backroom politics
   [_] Negative experience opposing one in combat
8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:
   [_] North America
   [_] Iraq
   [_] Central / South America
   [_] Aircraft carrier
   [_] Iraq
   [_] Europe
   [_] Middle East (not Iraq)
   [_] Iraq
   [_] Africa
   [_] Asia / Far East
   [_] Iraq
   [_] Misc. Third World countries
   [_] Classified
   [_] Iraq
9. Please check the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future:
   [_] Color TV
   [_] VCR
   [_] ICBM
   [_] Killer Satellite
   [_] CD Player
   [_] Air-to-Air Missiles
   [_] Space Shuttle
   [_] Home Computer
   [_] Nuclear Weapon
10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Check all that apply)
    [_] Communist / Socialist
    [_] Terrorist
    [_] Crazed
    [_] Neutral
    [_] Democratic
    [_] Dictatorship
    [_] Corrupt
    [_] Primitive / Tribal
11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
    [_] Deficit spending
    [_] Cash
    [_] Suitcases of cocaine
    [_] Oil revenues
    [_] Personal check
    [_] Credit card
    [_] Ransom money
    [_] Traveler's check
12. Your occupation:
    [_] Homemaker
    [_] Sales / marketing
    [_] Revolutionary
    [_] Clerical
    [_] Mercenary
    [_] Tyrant
    [_] Middle management
    [_] Eccentric billionaire
    [_] Defense Minister / General
    [_] Retired
    [_] Student
13. To help us understand our customers' lifestyles, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis:
    [_] Golf
    [_] Boating / sailing
    [_] Sabotage
    [_] Running / jogging
    [_] Propaganda / disinformation
    [_] Destabilization / overthrow
    [_] Default on loans
    [_] Gardening
    [_] Crafts
    [_] Black market / smuggling
    [_] Collectibles / collections
    [_] Watching sports on TV
    [_] Wines
    [_] Interrogation / torture
    [_] Household pets
    [_] Crushing rebellions
    [_] Espionage / reconnaissance
    [_] Fashion clothing
    [_] Border disputes
    [_] Mutually Assured Destruction

Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!
Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to:

McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION
Marketing Department
Military Aerospace Division

[prairiecamper]

That is hilarious.

[jevanb]

Old wife's tale I worked for them / Boeing for 15 years out of Lambert field then Nas Patuxent river, flight test FA/18ef

[Herk7769]

Heard Loud Noise... Looked up.

Soda shot out my nose.

[B47]

Originally Posted by herk7769

Heard Loud Noise... Looked up.

Soda shot out my nose.

Not you too - you have come down with the "Turbo" disease! It is fast becoming contagious.

Everyone - be sure to thoughly disinfect your keyboard and monitor screen after each occurence of the dreaded "Turbo" disease.

[TURBS]

Originally Posted by B47

Not you too - you have come down with the "Turbo" disease! It is fast becoming contagious.

Everyone - be sure to thoughly disinfect your keyboard and monitor screen after each occurence of the dreaded "Turbo" disease.

Lol on multiple accounts on this thread!

[B47]

Originally Posted by jevanb

Old wife's tale I worked for them / Boeing for 15 years out of Lambert field then Nas Patuxent river, flight test FA/18ef

Yes it is funny. But what is not funny when speaking about this company is their DC-10 airplane.

[jevanb]

Originally Posted by B47

Yes it is funny. But what is not funny when speaking about this company is their DC-10 airplane.

The 10 is not all bad, when we moved to MI in 05 , I went to work for a operator of DC3, and 4 now that is junk, glad we got rid of them years ago

[youroo]

I took it for what it is (VERY FUNNY)! Youroo!!