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Old 09-07-2015, 06:44 PM   #221
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Harry had been feeling sick lately and was finally convinced to see the Doctor after his wife Suzy’s urging. After a thorough examination, and much thought, the Doctor was ready to tell Harry and a very worried Suzy, his prognosis. Harry was too stressed out. He would need 6 months of pure relaxation. Suzy, very agitated, took out her notepad to begin writing down his list of orders for these months of relaxation. “How should I go about it?” asked Harry. “OK” said the doctor “I would like your wife to take one tranquilizer four times a day…”
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Old 09-07-2015, 06:45 PM   #222
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A cop pulled over a car and finds a young couple in the front seat. “Where’s your seat belt young man?” asked the cop. “Oh, I just took if off now when you were walking up to the car”, responded the man. “No you didn’t!” exclaimed his wife, “you never wear your seat belt!”. A little taken aback, the cop asked to see his license. “Aw shucks!” cried the man, “I must have left it home!” “Yeah right!” screamed his wife, “You know it expired 3 months ago!” At a loss for words, the cop asked the woman “are you always so tough on him?!” “No” responded the young woman, “only when he had too much to drink!”.
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Old 09-07-2015, 10:20 PM   #223
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Modern?

Family?

That's not my opinion of MY modern family.

Mine just sits there staring at a "Dumb" phone!

I just don't get this new form of intelligence.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Night Stone View Post
Hmm, does this include you

What, the dumbphone or the intelligence?

I still use a flip phone for what it is, a phone.

And when family is sitting around a room with their attention on an electronic device instead of talking to each other, that's no intelligence.

If it were up to me, I'd take up their phones when they enter the door. But the BOSS says no.
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Old 09-07-2015, 10:34 PM   #224
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An elderly couple was shopping in their hometown grocery store when an employee asked to see inside her purse. To her husbands surprise there was a can of peaches neatly hidden away. The police were called & she was taken away to jail. The next morning at her hearing, the judge expressed his displeasure with her & said I've examined the contents of the can & found it contained 6 peach halves. So you will serve one day for each one. When the judge asked if anyone else had any thing to say, her husband stood & said, your honor, she also stole a can of peas.
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Old 09-07-2015, 10:46 PM   #225
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Modern?

Family?

That's not my opinion of MY modern family.

Mine just sits there staring at a "Dumb" phone!

I just don't get this new form of intelligence.
They actually did an episode of modern family doing everything entirely with mobile devices. And yes we spend way too much time on ours too.... case in point, I'm on the kindle and DH is on the iPad right now (DD is in bed but also has a nabi tablet to use during the day). Our solution is to limit their use to travel, rainy days and after campfire on camping trips.
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Old 09-07-2015, 10:53 PM   #226
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A married couple come to the marriage counselor. The wife complains:
- We were having a perfect marriage until his girlfriend started dating my boyfriend..
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Old 09-07-2015, 10:58 PM   #227
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Timex View Post
What, the dumbphone or the intelligence?

I still use a flip phone for what it is, a phone.

And when family is sitting around a room with their attention on an electronic device instead of talking to each other, that's no intelligence.

If it were up to me, I'd take up their phones when they enter the door. But the BOSS says no.
Visiting grandma on the holidays

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Old 09-08-2015, 07:55 PM   #228
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Visiting grandma on the holidays


THAT IS IT RIGHT THERE!

Glad to know my family isn't the only 1!

My terminally ill 89 year old mother just doesn't understand why everybody plays with their phones instead of talking to each other like they used to do. They make it a point to come and see her and spend time with her and after about 5 minutes, it's back to the head in the phone.

I don't understand either.

Sorry to hijack the thread.

I thought I'd feel better after my rant, but I don't.
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Old 09-08-2015, 08:18 PM   #229
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Hey, my mom is 80 and SHE'S the one with her face in her iPhone or her iPad!! When we go out to dinner I have to tell HER to put the phone away until we leave the restaurant! No Bull!!


Edit: maybe I'm just boring
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Old 09-09-2015, 02:38 PM   #230
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A recent study has found that wives who carry a little extra weight live longer than the husbands who mention it
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