Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
The great question, which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?"
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays'
'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.'
'I've had bad luck with both my wives
The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'
James Holt McGavra
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming.
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
You know what I did before I married?
Anything I wanted to.
My wife and I were happy for twenty years.
Then we met.
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy : 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
Certified JB Welder. Certified 3M Duct Tape installer.
Certified Farmer's Co-Op bailing wire expert. Graduate of the "Rock on the side of the Trail as a Hammer" school of motorcycle repair.
Getting old is just a matter of narrowly missing all the things that kill you.