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02-01-2018, 07:44 PM
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#1821
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Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 41
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wmtire
My wife's father said to me, "Ten grand to never see my daughter again."
I said, "Okay, that sounds like a deal." I gave him the ten grand, packed my bags and left.
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LMAO
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02-01-2018, 07:54 PM
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#1822
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 10,907
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BandJCarm
The Manual
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And it's STILL a work in progress! 
__________________
1988 Coleman Sequoia - popup (1987-2009) - outlasted 3 Dodge Grand Caravans!
2012 Roo19 - hybrid (2012-2015)
2016 Mini Lite 2503S - tt (2015 - ???)
2011 Traverse LT, 3.6L, FWD
2009 Silverado 1500 Ext Cab, 5.3L, 4x4, 3.73
2016 Silverado 2500HD Dbl Cab, 6.0L 4x4, 4.10
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02-06-2018, 02:07 PM
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#1823
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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My wife isn’t happy with me this frosty morning, as she just told me she’s going out to scrape the car.
“Against what” was not the right reply
__________________
 2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-10-2018, 08:23 AM
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#1824
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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Boudreaux says to Thibodeaux "I can't believe it"...
"You win $100 million on the lotto on Wednesday, then find the love of your life just 2 days later"..."You are one lucky man my friend".
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-10-2018, 08:28 AM
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#1825
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 7,363
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Crazy how money talks!!
Russell
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02-10-2018, 11:22 AM
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#1826
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 7,916
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BandJCarm
The Manual
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I’ve got the full manual.... that version is just the Cliffsnotes.
__________________
2017 Puma 297RLSS
2005 Ram 2500 4X4 diesel SMOKER!!
I love puns, irony and tasteless jokes...
born in Texas.... live in Arkansas 
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02-10-2018, 12:32 PM
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#1827
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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I was minding communications at base when I got a call on the radio from Lance Corporal Sanders...
I said, "Sanders, you're breaking up!"
"Hold on a minute," he replied, "Let me try something...... How about now?"
"No, it's no good, " I told him, "your wife's still leaving you."
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-12-2018, 12:47 PM
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#1828
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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The wife highlighted my faults for me.
She thought the fluorescent yellow pen on my wrinkles, fat behind, and big nose looked alright.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-14-2018, 09:30 AM
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#1829
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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Being a single man, is this one appropriate for Valentine's Day? I'm asking for a friend. 
Roses are dead.
Love is fake.
Weddings are basically funerals with cake.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-14-2018, 09:52 AM
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#1830
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: BoCoMo
Posts: 2,784
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wmtire
Being a single man, is this one appropriate for Valentine's Day? I'm asking for a friend.
Roses are dead.
Love is fake.
Weddings are basically funerals with cake. |
It is for ValenGuys Day.
Stats have shown that most 'couples' break up on 2/13.... (ValenGirls Day)
And Stats have also shown, that those who 'marry' on 2/14... are the most likely to divorce.
Stats show that 'Guys' celebrate the most on 2/15... (ValenGuys Day) because 'life' goes back to 'normal'....
__________________
Brother Les
2013 Forest River Salem Hemisphere SBT312QBUD
2001 CrewCab F-250 7.3 PowerStroke Diesel
SuperChip, BTS transmission, 6.0 Trans Cooler
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02-14-2018, 09:53 AM
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#1831
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Between Pickles Gap and Toad Suck, AR
Posts: 6,070
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Yeah, and 83.40398% of all statistics are made up on the spot!
__________________
"Next to prayer, fishing is the most personal relationship of man" Herbert Hoover
"American by Birth, Southern by the Grace of God"Lewis Grizzard
FROG AR-0019-242
2016 GMC Denali 3500Dually--2017 CC 36CKTS
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02-14-2018, 10:19 AM
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#1833
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 10,907
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Well, it's Valentines Day!
One more opportunity to prove that YOU JUST DON'T MEASURE UP!!!
__________________
1988 Coleman Sequoia - popup (1987-2009) - outlasted 3 Dodge Grand Caravans!
2012 Roo19 - hybrid (2012-2015)
2016 Mini Lite 2503S - tt (2015 - ???)
2011 Traverse LT, 3.6L, FWD
2009 Silverado 1500 Ext Cab, 5.3L, 4x4, 3.73
2016 Silverado 2500HD Dbl Cab, 6.0L 4x4, 4.10
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02-14-2018, 10:35 AM
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#1834
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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Valentine's Day... or as single people call it
Happy Independence Day
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-14-2018, 10:36 AM
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#1835
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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I'm gonna spend Valentines day with my ex...... box 360
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-14-2018, 10:40 AM
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#1836
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: BoCoMo
Posts: 2,784
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On this day, make her laugh by breaking out in a song....
__________________
Brother Les
2013 Forest River Salem Hemisphere SBT312QBUD
2001 CrewCab F-250 7.3 PowerStroke Diesel
SuperChip, BTS transmission, 6.0 Trans Cooler
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02-14-2018, 10:40 AM
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#1837
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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My girlfriend told me she hoped I had something special planned for Valentine's Day.
I said, "I'm working on it." and she smiled.
Which was weird; I thought she'd be upset that I'm having to work on Valentine's Day.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-14-2018, 10:43 AM
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#1838
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,892
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I think Cupid must need glasses - the last time I dated a girl, he missed my heart but hit my wallet.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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02-14-2018, 11:16 AM
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#1839
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 7,916
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Roses are red, violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentines Day, the side chick is you!
What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has a date on Valentine's day.
What's the best part about Valentines Day? The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale
What is another way of saying Happy Valentines day! S.A.D, Singles Awareness Day!
What is the true purpose of Valentine's Day? To remind single people they are single.
Valentines Day is the day that the "V" and "D" come together.
__________________
2017 Puma 297RLSS
2005 Ram 2500 4X4 diesel SMOKER!!
I love puns, irony and tasteless jokes...
born in Texas.... live in Arkansas
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02-18-2018, 09:56 AM
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#1840
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 10,907
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Women, trust your husband
There comes a time when a woman just has to trust her husband...
A wife comes home late at night, and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.
From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two.
She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.
Leaving the covered bodies groaning, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.
As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine.
"Hi Darling", he says,
"Your parents have come to visit us, so l let them stay in our bedroom.
Did you say "hello"?
__________________
1988 Coleman Sequoia - popup (1987-2009) - outlasted 3 Dodge Grand Caravans!
2012 Roo19 - hybrid (2012-2015)
2016 Mini Lite 2503S - tt (2015 - ???)
2011 Traverse LT, 3.6L, FWD
2009 Silverado 1500 Ext Cab, 5.3L, 4x4, 3.73
2016 Silverado 2500HD Dbl Cab, 6.0L 4x4, 4.10
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