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11-23-2016, 03:39 PM
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#1301
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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It's like how I explained it to the wife. I have one pair of running shoes, and seven pairs of eating shoes.
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2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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11-23-2016, 03:44 PM
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#1302
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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The Theory of Relativity: Time moves more slowly when you are with your relatives
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2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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11-23-2016, 04:58 PM
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#1303
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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The kids will be mad when they discover there really isn't a law that prohibits them from talking while I drive.
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2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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11-23-2016, 05:01 PM
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#1304
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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The therapist told my wife to put some magic in our marriage. So she disappeared.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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11-23-2016, 05:12 PM
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#1305
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Site Team
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: top side land of Lincoln
Posts: 7,509
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I dated a lawyer until she said, "Stop, and/or I'll slap your face!"
__________________
2014 LaCrosse 323RST-TE-C
2009 Chevy 2500HD Z71
Seasonal
Zelda the campin dog
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11-23-2016, 05:13 PM
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#1306
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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My wife said she had no sleep last night because my snoring kept waking her up. I told her that if my snoring was waking her up, then obviously she had some sleep.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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11-23-2016, 05:58 PM
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#1307
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Coupeville, WA
Posts: 476
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wmtire
My wife said she had no sleep last night because my snoring kept waking her up. I told her that if my snoring was waking her up, then obviously she had some sleep.
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My wife thought I had sleep apnea because I stopped breathing during the night. My response was, why are you awake? Turns out she was the one with sleep apnea (well, me too). True story.
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11-27-2016, 04:08 AM
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#1308
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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I had my wife's name tattooed on my arm, "Awe, after all these years, a sign that you love me. " She gushed.
"Don't get excited, " I replied, "I've just been diagnosed with alzheimers"
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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11-27-2016, 05:29 AM
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#1309
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,024
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True story. Our granddaughter, Autumn, is three and cannot say, "ridiculous"...instead, she says, "ree-dick-lee-us"...it's very cute!
She was spending the night and I told her to go tell Nana that she's being ridiculous. She goes up to Nana and says, "Nana, I'm being ree-dick-lee-us!"
__________________
Rick & Karen
(Retired USAF, MSgt)
Monument, Colorado
8-year Travel Trailer RVers
2013 Forest River Rockwood Ultra-Lite 2904SS
2014 Toyota Tundra Maxcrew SR-5 TRD 4x4 (with Firestone airbags in the rear)
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12-02-2016, 09:24 AM
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#1310
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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I went out with one woman who turned out to be an arsonist.
I met her on match.com
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-03-2016, 08:13 AM
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#1311
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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Does anyone know how to disable the autocorrect feature on my wife?
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-06-2016, 04:10 AM
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#1312
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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A boy comes home and proudly announces to his parents "Mom, dad, the teacher asked the class a question today and I was the only one who knew the right answer!"
The parents are very happy and ask, "That's amazing Lenny! And what was the question?"
Sticking out his chest, the boy says, "Who farted?"
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-07-2016, 06:55 PM
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#1313
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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I think it's funny when dogs hide under the bed when they're scared.
I'm like, you idiot, that's the first place monsters go.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-07-2016, 06:58 PM
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#1314
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-07-2016, 07:30 PM
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#1315
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Southern, IL
Posts: 3,272
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Can't wait to try this...
__________________
Bob & Michelle
2016 Ford F-250 Lariat 4x4
2017 Flagstaff Super Lite 526RLWS
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12-08-2016, 09:34 AM
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#1316
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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My granddaughter came over to our place just as my wife and I were putting up our Christmas decorations.
"Grandad," she asked "will you be kissing granny under the mistletoe?"
"Under the mistletoe? I wouldn't kiss her under anesthesia"
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-08-2016, 05:59 PM
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#1317
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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Women say they like tall men. But I'm probably at least 6'4 in these stilettos and not a single girl in this bar has approached me yet
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-09-2016, 02:44 AM
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#1318
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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"Do you remember that fight we had twenty years ago when we sat down and wrote down each others faults?" I said to my wife.
"Oh Geez yes, I still have mine somewhere, " she said with a giggle.
"I've finished, " I replied.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-09-2016, 09:30 AM
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#1319
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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A beggar asked me for $5 today. He said, Since I lost my job, I've been homeless.
I replied, I know how you feel. Since I got married, I've been home less too
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-09-2016, 04:31 PM
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#1320
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,960
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My friend said, "I like your car."
I said, "It's not very practical now that we've got a baby."
He then remarked, "How about I buy it off you."
I said, "Yeah go on then. Three grand?"
He agreed, "You've got yourself a deal."
I told him "Nice... and you're going to make a good dad."
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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