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12-27-2013, 02:45 PM
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#1
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Senior Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 250
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My favorite Put-Downs
Put some variety in your life...find something new to hate.
I like your approach...now let's see your departure.
He's really a beautiful person on the inside....too bad he was born on the outside.
You must be a magician....you can turn anything into an argument.
Use your head....it's the little things that count.
She reminds me of a one-story house....nothing upstairs.
Would you mind closing the door....from the outside.
You've given me something to live for....revenge.
I guess it could be worse....you could be twins.
I've enjoyed talking to you....my mind needed the rest.
You have a striking personality....how long has it been on strike.
I've heard so much about you...what is your side of the story.
At least you're original....you make a new mistake everyday.
The only thing you took up in school was....space.
You're so full of bull.....the cows probably follow you home at night.
If you went to a mind reader....you'd only be charged 1/2 price.
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12-27-2013, 03:43 PM
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#2
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 7,916
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What's your hurry...here's your hat
__________________
2017 Puma 297RLSS
2005 Ram 2500 4X4 diesel SMOKER!!
I love puns, irony and tasteless jokes...
born in Texas.... live in Arkansas 
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12-27-2013, 03:44 PM
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#3
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 7,916
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Sorry. Reversed... Here is your hat...
__________________
2017 Puma 297RLSS
2005 Ram 2500 4X4 diesel SMOKER!!
I love puns, irony and tasteless jokes...
born in Texas.... live in Arkansas
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12-27-2013, 06:24 PM
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#4
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 13,734
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I can't read your mind....I don't like short stories
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12-27-2013, 06:29 PM
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#5
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 7,948
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Before I tell you mine you all MUST clear your mind....
Wow, that was quick!
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12-27-2013, 06:32 PM
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#6
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 7,948
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Do I come to where you work and tell you how to make the fries?
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12-27-2013, 06:34 PM
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#7
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 7,948
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You look like a million bucks...wrinkled and green.
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12-27-2013, 06:34 PM
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#8
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 7,948
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I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
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12-27-2013, 06:41 PM
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#9
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 10,907
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Come again ..... when you can't stay so long.
__________________
1988 Coleman Sequoia - popup (1987-2009) - outlasted 3 Dodge Grand Caravans!
2012 Roo19 - hybrid (2012-2015)
2016 Mini Lite 2503S - tt (2015 - ???)
2011 Traverse LT, 3.6L, FWD
2009 Silverado 1500 Ext Cab, 5.3L, 4x4, 3.73
2016 Silverado 2500HD Dbl Cab, 6.0L 4x4, 4.10
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12-27-2013, 07:15 PM
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#10
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Lake County, Illinois
Posts: 301
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Winston Churchill was a master of the art of the put down.
Once he was seated next to Lady Aster (a political enemy) at a dinner party. The conversation went:
"Winston, if you were my husband, i would put poison in your tea."
"Nancy, if you were my wife, I'd drink it."
Another political enemy was George Bernard Shaw At a chance meeting:
"Winston, I'm sending you two tickets for the opening night of my new play. Bring a friend, if you have one."
"I'm sorry George, I'm busy that night, but I'd love to see it on the second night, if there is one."
Joel
__________________
2011 Silverado 2500HD Duramax, 4x4, crew cab, long bed
Palomino Puma 253-FBS, 27' 5th wheel
1994 19' Class B on Chevy chassis
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12-27-2013, 08:00 PM
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#11
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,933
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One of my favorites that I used on one of my friends once (he still talks about it to this day):
"You look like a professional blind date"
__________________
 2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-27-2013, 11:10 PM
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#12
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Always Learning
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Four Corners, FL
Posts: 21,891
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I was a little more bold- I once told my wife:
Quote:
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Don't speak, it makes you unattractive.
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And I lived to tell the tale!
__________________
Officially a SOB with a 2022 Jayco Precept 36C
Checkout my site for RVing tips, tricks, and info | Was a Fulltime Family for 5 years, now we're part-timing on long trips
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12-28-2013, 01:41 AM
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#13
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Northeast Louisiana
Posts: 33,933
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The going got weird and he turned pro.
The only thing he brought to this job was his car.
The twinkle in his eyes is actually the sun shining between his ears.
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
We do not complain about your shortcomings but about your long stayings.
Whatever is eating you - must be suffering horribly.
I always wanted to be a troubleshooter but now I see you are not worth it!
I'd like to give you a going-away present ... but you have to do your part.
He/She's so short you can see their legs on their drivers license picture.
__________________
2011 Flagstaff 831 RLBSS
A 72 hour hold in a psych unit is beginning to intrigue me as a potential vacation opportunity.
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12-28-2013, 06:28 AM
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#14
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 4,499
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Told this one to my know it all 13 year old daughter.
I feel so sad for you.
Daughter - why?
Because I used to be as smart as you, but everyday, from now on, for the rest of your life, your gonna be losing all that knowledge just like i did, and when you're my age you'll be as dumb as me.
__________________
2018 Forester 3011 DS
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12-28-2013, 11:41 AM
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#15
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 10,907
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Quote:
Told this one to my know it all 13 year old daughter.
I feel so sad for you.
Daughter - why?
Because I used to be as smart as you, but everyday, from now on, for the rest of your life, your gonna be losing all that knowledge just like i did, and when you're my age you'll be as dumb as me.
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Mark Twain said that when he was 16, his father didn't know anything, but by the time he was 21, it was amazing how much the old man had learned.
__________________
1988 Coleman Sequoia - popup (1987-2009) - outlasted 3 Dodge Grand Caravans!
2012 Roo19 - hybrid (2012-2015)
2016 Mini Lite 2503S - tt (2015 - ???)
2011 Traverse LT, 3.6L, FWD
2009 Silverado 1500 Ext Cab, 5.3L, 4x4, 3.73
2016 Silverado 2500HD Dbl Cab, 6.0L 4x4, 4.10
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12-28-2013, 11:47 AM
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#16
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Keller, Texas
Posts: 6,090
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Heard this one once-
He's so bow-legged,he couldn't catch a pig in a ditch.
Well I thought it was funny. 
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12-28-2013, 12:33 PM
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#17
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Site Team
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 4,499
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockfordroo
Mark Twain said that when he was 16, his father didn't know anything, but by the time he was 21, it was amazing how much the old man had learned.
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Great. I've often said "the older I got, the smarter he was."
__________________
2018 Forester 3011 DS
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12-28-2013, 01:22 PM
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#18
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Senior member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Oregon Illinois
Posts: 134
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These are great can think of many uses
__________________
2012 Salem 27rls TT
2006 Dodge Ram Big horn 5.7 v 8
2012 camped 32 days
2013 so far 48 days
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12-28-2013, 01:49 PM
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#19
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Keller, Texas
Posts: 6,090
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Quote:
Originally Posted by geodavis
These are great can think of many uses
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Right - but will you remember them when you want to use one of them? 
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12-28-2013, 06:53 PM
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#20
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Broken Toe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Imperial (St. Louis) MO
Posts: 3,745
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"you look like an easter island statue with an ass full of razor blades"
Tim
__________________
FROG Member MO-0008-571 Since 20124444444444My Project Blog: https://cowracer.blogspot.com/
"Camper" 2016 Rockwood Signature Ultralite 8329ss
"Casper" 2017 Ram 2500 Laramie Diesel
..ProPride 3P Hitch - "Yeah. It's worth it."
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