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Old 09-18-2012, 11:55 AM   #1
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Location: Northeast Louisiana
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New medications for women (joke)

The Newest Medications For Women
  • Damitol -Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 hours.
  • St. Momís Wort - Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering her children unconscious for up to six hours.
  • Emptynestrogen - Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.
  • Peptobimbo - Liquid silicone for single women...2 full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting.
  • Dumerol - When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ causing enjoyment of "blondie type activities."
  • Flipitor - Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
  • Menicillin - Potent antibiotic for older women...Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want to be a better person can we get naked now?"
  • Buy-agra - Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping...Increases potency and duration of spending spree
  • Buy-one-al - When combined with Buy-agra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura.
  • Jackasspirin - Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.
  • Anti-talksident - A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.
  • Sexcedrin - More effective than Excedrin in treating the, "Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome.
  • Ragamet - When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as ragging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.
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Old 09-18-2012, 12:49 PM   #2
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Location: Roman Forest, TX
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Heh heh!
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