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Old 12-10-2014, 04:14 PM   #1
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Location: Home of the National League Champs
Posts: 5,514
The Guy's Rules

Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1"

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions
and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -
so they understand.

Next year is here - GO CUBS- 3 more WINS to go
2014 LaCrosse 323RST-TE-C
2009 CHEVY 2500HD Silverado Z71
2016- 89 nights of camping
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Old 12-10-2014, 04:29 PM   #2
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Location: Moundsville Wv
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Haha that's funny #1 down the line about the headache I'm still lol,DW says what's so funny lol

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Old 12-10-2014, 04:48 PM   #3
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Pretty well sums it up! Good job!
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Old 12-10-2014, 04:52 PM   #4
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I really liked #1
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Old 12-10-2014, 04:53 PM   #5
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Location: Lower Michigan
Posts: 1,272
Yep, that says it all!
Bill & Pam
2014 Trilogy 3650RE
2015 F350 PSD
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Old 12-10-2014, 05:51 PM   #6
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Posts: 560
We understand. It's just a female biological imperative to annoy the crap out of any male. Lol

Sent from my iPad using Forest River Forums

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