Wrong Mount Everest Guide

[wmtire]

The Top 16 Signs You've Chosen the Wrong Mount Everest Guide
16> The last three days, all you've had to eat is s'mores.


15> Every morning greets the group with, "Wonder who'll die today?"


14> Doesn't worry about provisions, as there's bound to be a
Starbucks or McDonald's every half mile or so.


13> Gets lost in the "Sherpa Shack" gift shop.



12> Makes everyone do upside down shots off the St. Bernard's
collar.


11> First day's preparation devoted entirely to making snow angels.


10> Every 10 minutes, stops and yells, "RICOLO."


9> Throws a fit when her stiletto heel gets stuck in the ice.


8> Has everyone stick their tongues to a cherry popsicle "for
practice."



7> Keeps repeating, "Is it me, or is it cold up here?"


6> "Map, schmap -- you see the top from here!!"


5> Two words: Golf Clubs.


4> Forgets to wear socks with his sandals.


3> Keeps using the oxygen tanks to make balloon animals.


2> Every so often, turns and screams, "Stop following me!"

and the Number 1 Sign You've Chosen the Wrong Mount Everest Guide...

1> Squeezes your sides then yells, "Hey, if we get stranded we can live off Tubby here for a week!"