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Old 01-02-2017, 12:58 PM   #181
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Not exactly a "quote" but still one of my favorites.


The sentence below is false.
The sentence above is true.
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Old 01-02-2017, 01:03 PM   #182
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"Dad! The older I get, the smarter he was."
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Old 01-02-2017, 01:23 PM   #183
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"Dad! The older I get, the smarter he was."
Yup! .....& another version ....I remember Dad as being quite old before he became very smart......
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Old 01-02-2017, 01:30 PM   #184
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Originally Posted by Volvodriver View Post
Here's a couple more I remember from the mists of time.

Sign in Bud's Texaco station and garage from my home town.
If the job is impossible we'll do it right away - if it's difficult it may take a little longer.

Sign in an old retired Ford mechanic's shop behind his house in Corpus Christi Texas and was still wrenching in to his 80's.
There will be a $10.00 charge to listen to how everything is so great and wonderful where you come from.

Or a similar charge to hear they could fix it themselves(and how to do it) if they had the tools or time. It's just easier to bring it in. Then the life story of how they used to fix them.


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Old 01-02-2017, 05:08 PM   #185
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I'm from the government, and I'm here to help !

I'm not totally useless, I can be used as a bad example .
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Old 01-02-2017, 06:10 PM   #186
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Originally Posted by dcheatwood View Post
"Dad! The older I get, the smarter he was."
This is actually sort of a take-off from a Mark Twain quote:

“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
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Old 01-02-2017, 07:04 PM   #187
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Old 01-02-2017, 07:21 PM   #188
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Old 01-03-2017, 05:32 AM   #189
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Old 01-18-2017, 09:00 PM   #190
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To me, it’s always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, “Hey, can you give me a hand?,” you can say, “Sorry, got these sacks.”

Jack Handy
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