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Old 06-04-2017, 02:24 PM   #21
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I agree. Wait a little bit of time, more than 6 months.
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Old 06-04-2017, 03:02 PM   #22
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So sorry for your loss. Give it time.

Do not make any fast rash decisions. Everyone is different.

I have a friend who just turned eighty he lost his wife two years ago of 46 years and he recently remarried and is still traveling............
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Old 06-04-2017, 04:17 PM   #23
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Cotton65, our deepest condolence from Sue & I.
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Old 06-04-2017, 04:41 PM   #24
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Our deepest condolences for your untimely loss.
Our hearts go out to you and your family in this time of grief.

Please don't do anything for a while. Then, maybe try a local camping trip with a club or FROG rally to be around people you know. Time and people will heal your wounds; deep as they are.

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Old 06-04-2017, 05:22 PM   #25
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Hi Cotton, You have my sincere, deepest sympathy for your recent loss of your most beloved wife. Everyone has suggested excellent ideas about allowing yourself whatever needed time to gather your thoughts and feelings. You're to be commended and continually encouraged to share your thoughts with this forum.
I'll say prayers for you. If you feel the need to text or talk about anything going on in your life, you may contact me by PM. Having lost my dear husband of 37 years of a wonderful marriage about 7 years ago, I, too, may understand your challenges.
May you be comforted knowing Forum members care about you. May God's Angels help you every day.
Most Sincerely,
Suzanne
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Old 06-04-2017, 05:31 PM   #26
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Sorry for your loss. Must be hard on you. Slow down and take some time prior to making big decidions. Eventuly it will get better. Good luck. There is light there
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Old 06-04-2017, 07:53 PM   #27
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Cotton, I'm so sorry for your loss. My DH last his first wife suddenly a little over 8 years ago. By all accounts, he was a royal mess and was coming out of shell shock when we met 2 years later. He says the advice to make no major decisions for 6 months to a year is a wise one. His children came in and gave away a lot of her things before he was ready. He says you'll know when the time is right. Listen to your gut, I'm pretty sure it doesn't lead you wrong very often.
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Old 06-04-2017, 08:08 PM   #28
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So very sorry for your loss. Just take your time before making a decision on the camper. I am glad that the two of you shared several years enjoying camping together. Prayers that you will find comfort in the fun and happy memories you shared. Hoping that one day you will again enjoy the peace that camping can bring.
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Old 06-04-2017, 08:37 PM   #29
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I am so sorry for your loss.
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Old 06-04-2017, 09:06 PM   #30
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Hi, I have been through this already, my wife and kids, then grandkids, then just the two of us camped for 46 years then in October 2015 while preparing for a rally in Alabama my wife mentioned that she thought she had a hemorrhiod, after a quick visit to family Dr then referral in less than a day to the hospital we learned that she in fact had what appeared to be cancer. Trip cancelled and lots of tests with up and down results we learned she had stage four cancer and it was in the bones and liver.
We had been planning on buying a new fifth wheel and had bought the truck and had picked which one we wanted.
Now we were faced with all the decisions people have to look at and they are not easy ones even though the result were going to be the same no matter what we did, one of my instant decisions was that I would sell the camper, my wife told me not to and i was also instructed to keep camping and to get the new trailer. I have carried out her wishes, it has not been without difficulty I still cry and I still miss her a lot every day but so far I don't regret still camping, I have received a huge amount of support from fellow frogs. I take my wifes ashes with me when I travel and feel that she is with me.
I am so sorry for your loss and believe me I know what you are going through, as others have said try not to make any quick decisions. If I can be of any further assistance to you please let me know.
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Old 06-04-2017, 09:48 PM   #31
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I am truly sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine myself going through what you are facing. Now is not the time to make big decisions. Give yourself some time to heal.

One day at a time.
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Old 06-04-2017, 10:17 PM   #32
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My heartfelt condolences for the most terrible loss most persons will experience in their life. I can only imagine the sorrow you feel.

As for the camper, since you say you are upside down in it anyway why not consider keeping and using it as a tribute to your wife. If it were my wife I believe she would want mt to keep it, use it and recall all the wonderful memories we made in that camper. She certainly would not want me to take a huge financial loss just to rid myself of those wonderful memories.

Just my thoughts
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Old 06-05-2017, 12:02 AM   #33
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So sorry. You have received plenty of great thoughts here from your fellow F.R.O.G.'S. I will only add that if you follow your heart hers will be with you always.
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Old 06-05-2017, 04:23 AM   #34
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Stay busy. Go camping with friends or a group. Difficult time and we all face it sooner or later. Don't give up what you enjoy. Right now, it will get you out of the house.
I wish you peace during this difficult time.
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Old 06-05-2017, 06:15 AM   #35
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Wife passed in the night

We were camping with friends in northern Michigan on September 8, 2001. She had been having some minor heartburn during the day. She had her first heart attack and passed in her sleep. (54 years old)
A friend had also recently lost his wife and asked me to meet him at a recovery support group. He did not show up and I ended up asking directions from a lady in the parking lot. Everyone else was late and we spent quite awhile talking. The very last thing that I expected or wanted happened. A year later we were married and I could not be happier. It has truely been a match made in heaven. We are going on 15 years now.
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Old 06-05-2017, 08:04 AM   #36
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You have thousands of friends

Even though I have never met you, I feel a kinship for you. My Mom died 17 years ago and my Dad sold the pickup truck they had to camp in. He kept the new camper that was on it because it was too hard to sell with the attached memories. He will never camp again (he is 90) but it just takes a little space in the garage and it will go to someone who needs a new camper that is 19 years old.

Might I suggest that you find someone or a couple that has never camped before and take them out for a few days? Being a host will benefit you and them and there is something about being away from the phone, the yard, and the noise and sitting around a campfire sharing stories and memories that heals the soul (it does for me).

As you have been advised: Make no financial decisions or life changing decisions (work, social clubs, spending) for at least 6 months. There is a school or church somewhere that can use a man like you. All kids need a grandpa and many don't have one. The Red Cross can use a volunteer for a few hours a week, and every nursing home needs people to visit those who have been left behind. It is true that sometimes the best thing to do is to lose yourself in the service of others.

The sun will come up tomorrow. Best to you.
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Old 06-05-2017, 09:14 AM   #37
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Cotton 65, So very sorry for you loss. Life can be very difficult at times. But one must remember to trust in God and he will help you thru the hard times. As others have said, take your time and you will do what your heart desires. Prayers your way!
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Old 06-05-2017, 06:30 PM   #38
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Cotton, You may not realize it, but you have touched a lot of hearts with this message. This once tough guy is sitting here with tears in my eyes. It probably wouldn't hurt any of us married ones to stop for a moment and think about what it would really be like if it were us. Thank you for having the courage to share this. My wife and I will include you in our nighttime prayers. God bless you my camping friend.
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Old 06-05-2017, 08:42 PM   #39
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Cotton, I am so sorry for your loss. I can totally relate to your situation. In 2012 my Conni passed away from stage 4 metastatic breast cancer. We had traveled all over in our 34 ft 5th wheel. I was totally lost. I stepped back trying to decide what to do. I decided that Conni would want me to continue on, so I did in memory of her. I did some local camping with some Good Sam groups.

In 2014 I met a wonderful woman (Pat). We bought a new 37 ft 5th wheel and planned to travel and enjoy our life. This past October 2016 she got sick and was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer. Six weeks later she passed away. Suddenly, I am back in the same situation of loss. Two weeks ago I attended the Indiana Good Sams state rally. There were many wonderful people there to lift my spirits up and allowed me to stay in "our" camper. I felt Pat's hand on my shoulder while there. It is like her saying "hang on sweetheart, I am with you."

So Cotton, take a deep breath and ask yourself, what would your wife want you to do?
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