Travel With Medical Issues

ToniandSal · 03-26-2017, 12:10 PM

This has become a situation. When we purchased our motorhome my husband was experiencing mild dementia. It has worsened and I don't know about more RV travel now. Evenings are not easy. I love our motorhome and the Wrangler toad. But, I haven't made any reservations for this year. Has anyone had this experience? What have you done?

bob caldwell · 03-26-2017, 12:18 PM

Check out Sky Med

Kimber45 · 03-26-2017, 12:25 PM

I'm very sorry to hear. Only you can make that decesion. If you dont have the ability to drive and handle everything on your own and keep and eye on him and help him you are not only endangering yourself and him but others and that is not OK.

Clearly no one but you and professionals would know his situation or level of advancement. Driving an rv, towing a vehicle and setting up an rv are no joke for someone who is not in there full capacity.

How would you feel if something happened to you your husband or others and decide yourself based on the facts of his condition.

camper70 · 03-26-2017, 04:57 PM

Hi! I'm very sorry to hear of your husbands dementia. My mom passed away 3 years ago from Dementia. I agree with Kimber45 only you and the doctors can help you make that decision. It is near impossible for one person to care for someone with dementia in A home setting. I don't know how you would do it on the road. Not saying it couldn't be done but I would imagine it would be extremely difficult. My heart goes out to you because I know what you will have to go through. Good luck to you in whatever you decide to do.

ToniandSal · 03-26-2017, 06:59 PM

My husband attends a class/club for dementia patients where they engage in cognitive activities. One of the other wives told me that she now limits heir getaways to a one day drive from home. I think that is an excellent idea. So far, my husband is no problem on the road, but I would definitely feel more comfortable with the one day drive. Fortunately, we live close enough to several nice campgrounds south of us in San Diego and north of us in Santa Barbara, etc. It's the evenings when things get disorientated for him.
I was wondering if anyone else here has dealt with this, and how did you sanely handle it?

camper70 · 03-26-2017, 10:09 PM

I forgot to mention something very important in caring for a person with dementia. PATIENCE! this is the most important and hardest thing to do. It ended in poor health for my father. He passed before my mom because he could not accept the reality. Resist trying to convince him he is wrong or made a mistake. He will just get mad or argue with you. My dad could not learn to do this. You just have to go with the flow and go on with life. It is not worth spending your time arguing with the one you love over trivial things. Once again Good Luck in your journey.

mtnlvr · 03-27-2017, 02:32 PM

Can you drive the rv and hook up the toad alone? I am a female who travels solo with a 25'er. I added an extra rear camera and rear bumper sensors, no toad. A couple of weeks ago a couple pulled in next to me traveling in a 33' class A towing a SUV. The wife was doing the driving. Her husband was blind. (He was hooking up the power cords.) I was really impressed!
Good luck, I know it's a really difficult situation you are in.

ToniandSal · 03-27-2017, 03:02 PM

Yes, I can hook up the Jeep. Actually, because my husband no longer drives, I drove us and two of our dogs from CA to NY and back last summer to visit his grown kids. It gets tiring doing all the driving, so I planned each day at 250 to 300 miles. No toad then, just the motorhome. Husband loved getting to sight see along the way. His dementia has slowly progressed, but he is on meds for that. However, I don't think I will be taking the trip to the Oregon coast like I had wanted. I think sticking to areas here in Orange County and south in San Diego might be better.

ToniandSal · 03-27-2017, 03:03 PM

Oh, and our 22' Forester came with rear camera and side mirror cameras. They are priceless!

lugoismad · 03-27-2017, 07:59 PM

I'm a father of a 6 year old autistic daughter. Getting more than her name out of her when she's upset, frightened, or just...if the sky happens to have too many clouds that day, or her favorite episode of Bob's Burgers wasn't on TV, is next to impossible.

Obviously, our situations are very different. But, they are also very similar. She likes to wander off. She wakes up in the middle of the night and likes to explore. At home we've had to turn the door knob around on her room and lock her in. I had to use wood dowels to keep her from opening her windows - I caught her exiting her room via her window one night after we'd tucked her into bed. There is no child safety lock that she can't open. She's like Rainman, but for opening stuff that can kill her. We've had to change all the deadbolts in our house to the kind that have keys on both sides, so we can make sure the doors stay locked so she can't get out if my wife is in the bathroom or something.

We make it work. Obviously we have the advantage of her being six and I'm 5x her size and weight. Her bunk has an emergency exit door. After mulling it over with the wife, we made the decision to put an outside latch on it, so it can't be opened from the inside. On the main camper door I installed an alarm that will go off if the door is opened.

Much like you, evenings can be rough. Yesterday she was unhappy that we changed her pajamas from winter pajamas to spring time ones. It was too hot to wear fleece anymore. 2 hours of screaming herself to sleep. She didn't even know why she was upset anymore, she just knew she was angry and was going to let us know about it.

I make it a habit to walk around to our camping neighbors when I see them out and let them know that around 7:30pm I'm not stabbing my daughter to death, its just bedtime and she doesn't like it.

Her and her twin sister have bracelets with their names and our phone number on it.

Before we go anywhere with a lot of people where she has in increased risk of running off and us being unable to find her, we take a picture of her, so we have a photo of her in the same clothes she is wearing.

Wish I had a magic fix for you. Sorry.

mtnlvr · 03-27-2017, 09:44 PM

I think you both really deserve a vacation- literally!

thetinhouse · 08-06-2017, 09:16 PM

As a geriatric consultant when I was working full-time as a hospital pharmacist,
I am saddened by your husband's diagnosis and would be extremely concerned should he begin 'sundowning' while you are travelling alone with him or in a campground away from medical assistance if required.
It would not be practical to bring a 'care-giver' with you to assist you in your husband's care and monitoring. Having him wander off while in a strange city or distant campground is but one of many 'worst-case-scenarios' I have experienced with my clients in the past. He must be closely monitored and cannot be left alone. Please consider the ramifications of RV travelling with him.
I am hoping he is being cared for by a geriatrician who would be the best person to tell you what you and your husband's limits might be.
Good luck and God Bless.
The Tin House

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