2 people on a plane

[Herk7769]

A congressman was seated next to a little girl on an airplane. He turned to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."

The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "What would you want to talk about?"

“Oh, I don't know," said the congressman. "How about global warming , universal health care , or stimulus packages?" as he smiled smugly.

"OK," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"

The legislator, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea."

To which the little girl replies, "How do you really feel qualified to discuss global warming, universal health care, or the economy, when you don't know crap?"

And then she went back to reading her book.

[5picker]

A congressman was visiting constituents in his district and on this day, was visiting one of the largest farms in his territory.

As they were touring the farm and walking through the barn, there were what seemed like hundreds of flies swarming around the congressman's head.

After swatting at them several times with no relief, the congressman finally asked the farmer, "What kind of flies are these?"

The farmer said, "Oh, I don't know. We just call them the little flies that that fly around a horses behind."

The congressman rared back and said to the farmer, "You're not calling me a horses behind are you?"

The farmer simply smiled and said... "No, but you can't fool those little flies!"