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Old 11-09-2020, 09:48 AM   #2101
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I see people around my age mountain climbing. I feel good getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.
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I often say to myself, "I can't believe that cloning machine worked."
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Old 11-09-2020, 01:49 PM   #2102
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Old 11-09-2020, 04:21 PM   #2103
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Canít believe I got fired on my very first day as a signwirter.
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I often say to myself, "I can't believe that cloning machine worked."
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Old 11-09-2020, 06:31 PM   #2104
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Canít believe I got fired on my very first day as a signwirter.
I'd file a grievance with the signwirter's union.

Also file a complaint with the ADA. Dyslexia is a handicap isn't it?
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Old 11-09-2020, 06:31 PM   #2105
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Can’t believe I got fired on my very first day as a signwirter.
I can. It's not that hard being a signrighter, just make sure it can be red without standing on your hed.
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Old 11-09-2020, 11:12 PM   #2106
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I can. Everybody nose theirs know w in right!
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Canít believe I got fired on my very first day as a signwirter.
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Old 11-10-2020, 05:41 AM   #2107
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very good, thank you
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Old 11-10-2020, 04:52 PM   #2108
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PERKS OF BEING OVER 55:
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
4. People call at 9 pm and ask, " Did I wake you???? "
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat dinner at 4 pm.
9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
18 Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
19. You can't remember who posted this list.
20.You can't even remember if this list has been posted before
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Old 11-11-2020, 10:47 AM   #2109
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Chevy owners....
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Old 11-11-2020, 11:05 AM   #2110
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wmtire View Post
I see people around my age mountain climbing. I feel good getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.



Repeat from post #2096....


Must be new underwear day....



SailorSam20500 got wmtire's

and wmtire got SailorSam20500's.....


Thank God for boxers.... Being 'broke in' or 'blowed out'.... there is no difference.
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Old 11-11-2020, 11:08 AM   #2111
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Chevy owners....
The guy must not know lumber yards sell hammers and nails. Drop the tailgate and nail it to the floor of the bed.
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Old 11-11-2020, 11:46 AM   #2112
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TitanMike View Post
PERKS OF BEING OVER 55:
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
4. People call at 9 pm and ask, " Did I wake you???? "
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat dinner at 4 pm.
9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
18 Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
19. You can't remember who posted this list.
20.You can't even remember if this list has been posted before
"Life in prison" is starting to have less of a deterrent effect.
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Old 11-11-2020, 12:24 PM   #2113
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"Life in prison" is starting to have less of a deterrent effect.
This is why many say to never mess with an old man.
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Old 11-11-2020, 12:29 PM   #2114
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I tried hard to come up with an original Halloween costume and finally decided to go as a band-aid. But I had to cancel that idea when I put together a costume and tried it out the day before. I just couldn't pull it off.
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Old 11-12-2020, 11:24 AM   #2115
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Les View Post
Repeat from post #2096....


Must be new underwear day....



SailorSam20500 got wmtire's

and wmtire got SailorSam20500's.....


Thank God for boxers.... Being 'broke in' or 'blowed out'.... there is no difference.

I was too lazy to edit and repeated my own post. I think the first shot was on #2020....
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Save the Earth. Itís the only known planet with Beer.
There are times where my greatest accomplishment is keeping my mouth shut...

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Old 11-12-2020, 01:26 PM   #2116
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A somewhat skewed view of tomato soup
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Old 11-12-2020, 04:36 PM   #2117
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Old 11-12-2020, 05:05 PM   #2118
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Not everyone has Windows. Some have Macs.

BTW, Our power is out right now. Does anyone care?

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Old 11-12-2020, 06:04 PM   #2119
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Not everyone has Windows. Some have Macs.

BTW, Our power is out right now. Does anyone care?
Not untill the generator quits and batteries go dead. Ask me in a week
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Old 11-14-2020, 03:02 PM   #2120
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A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard.
The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss."The 4 year old nods his head in approval.
The 6 year old continues,"When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass."
The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.
When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios.
WHACK!
He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up,and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit,slapping his rear with every step.
His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!"
She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"
"I don't know," he blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios!"
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