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Old 07-16-2015, 10:38 AM   #1
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facebook humor

I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles.

Every day I go down on the street and tell the passersby what I have eaten, how I feel, what I have done the night before and what I will do tomorrow night. Then I give them pictures of my family, my dog and me gardening and spending time in my pool.

I also listen to their conversations and I tell them I love them.

It works.

I already have 3 persons following me; two policemen and a psychiatrist.
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Old 07-16-2015, 10:41 AM   #2
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Did you know people are getting paid to mention products in their Facebook statuses?

That's as crazy as the discounts at Dave's Furniture Emporium...
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Old 07-16-2015, 10:43 AM   #3
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Facebook should have a limit on the number of times people can change their relationship status.

After five, it ought to default to "Unstable"
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Old 07-16-2015, 10:44 AM   #4
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How many teenage girls does it take to change a lightbulb?

Eleven. One to change the lightbulb and ten to each take 200 photos of it for Facebook and clog up my news feed.
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Old 07-16-2015, 10:49 AM   #5
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"Find your ideal partner on Facebook!"

No thanks, I can safely say that one quality I am not looking for in a partner is the ability to maintain a virtual farm.
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Old 07-16-2015, 10:53 AM   #6
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Facebook is apparently down. Millions of mothers worldwide have to raise their babies now instead of posting updates about them..
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Old 07-16-2015, 10:58 AM   #7
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No wonder you have over 6,000 posts here.......lol
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Old 07-16-2015, 10:59 AM   #8
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Got a drug problem? Talk to Frank.

Got any other problem....Tell everyone on Facebook.
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Old 04-21-2016, 04:17 PM   #9
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Anyone remember the good old days before Facebook, Instagram and Twitter?
When you had to take a photo of your dinner, then get the film developed, then go around to all your friends' houses to show them the picture of your dinner? No? Me neither.
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Old 04-21-2016, 04:18 PM   #10
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If you need Facebook to remind you it's your wife's birthday, I hope you own a comfortable couch.
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Old 04-21-2016, 04:27 PM   #11
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I've always thought "no one cares what I do every hour of every day". Now if I can just convince my friends to think that way.
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Old 05-15-2016, 11:10 AM   #12
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A friend of mine on Facebook posted this on her newsfeed.

'Do something today that your future self will thank you for'

So I unfriended her.
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Old 05-17-2016, 10:57 PM   #13
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If Facebook has taught us anything, it's that a lot of us are not quite ready for a spelling bee.

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Old 05-19-2016, 09:25 AM   #14
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Most annoying facebook people:



"FML! WORST DAY EVER! I CANT TAKE ANY MORE!!!~!"


........................................... "What's wrong?"


"I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT"






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Old 05-19-2016, 09:34 AM   #15
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I have unfriended Facebook.
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Old 05-19-2016, 10:40 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BandJCarm View Post
I have unfriended Facebook.
I wish. Unfortunately, I'm going in the opposite direction and am getting in bed deeper with it with some social marketing for my blog.
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