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Old 12-16-2013, 08:25 AM   #1
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Society is DOOMED

New sign at Wal-Mart

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Our society is doomed..............

IDIOT SIGHTING

I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00
I said "May I have large bills, please"

She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same size."
When I got up off the floor I explained it to her....


IDIOT SIGHTING
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton,MS


IDIOT SIGHTING
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
He said, 'NO, it's not..' Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.
She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'
The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.
-- From Kansas City



IDIOT SIGHTING
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.


IDIOT SIGHTING
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS


IDIOT SIGHTING
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,'
our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.'
Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.


IDIOT SIGHTING
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself
and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff’s office, no less.



IDIOT SIGHTING
How would you pronounce this child's name?
"Le-a"
Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.
This child attends a school in Kansas City, Mo.
Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong.
It's pronounced "Ledasha".
When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."

SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember to pronounce the dash.
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent.

STAY ALERT!

They walk among us......and they VOTE.
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Old 12-16-2013, 08:34 AM   #2
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I don't usually visit the jokes section.... but these are truly hilarious!

hi·lar·i·ous
həˈle(ə)rēəs/
adjective
adjective: hilarious
1.
extremely amusing.
"a hilarious dialogue from characters we never meet again"
synonyms:very funny, hysterically funny, hysterical, uproarious, riotous, rollicking, farcical, rib-tickling;
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Old 12-16-2013, 08:36 AM   #3
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Wow! And these people breed.
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Old 12-16-2013, 08:59 AM   #4
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Funny stuff....thanks for posting.
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Old 12-16-2013, 09:18 AM   #5
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Regarding the Wal Mart 15 items limit sign, before our local Kroger store underwent a remodeling, they had the same sign.

After the remodeling,that sign was replaced with a "About 15 items" sign at their express lanes.

I thought that was a little "softer" than the hard 15 items sign.
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Old 12-16-2013, 09:52 AM   #6
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This all just goes to show common sense isn't as common as it used to be. Not to mention you can't buy it at Wal-Mart anymore!!!!!
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:09 AM   #7
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A few years back when the kids were young we went to a McDonalds near DC & asked for our sons usual a plain Cheeseburger......... We got it & sat down
It had NO cheese.......... took it back to the counter .........asked why......

The young clerk said....That is a plain cheeseburger (It has no cheese....) I could not help myself.... I asked then what is a plain hamburger .........just the bun?????????

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Old 12-16-2013, 10:13 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Oaklevel View Post
A few years back when the kids were young we went to a McDonalds near DC & asked for our sons usual a plain Cheeseburger......... We got it & sat down
It had NO cheese.......... took it back to the counter .........asked why......

The young clerk said....That is a plain cheeseburger (It has no cheese....) I could not help myself.... I asked then what is a plain hamburger .........just the bun?????????

And these are people are our future!!! There is no way this is going to turn out well.
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:16 AM   #9
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I'm having some deja vu all over again.

http://www.forestriverforums.com/for...nds-34217.html
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:18 AM   #10
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It must be something with McDonalds. I believe they do an IQ test and if you score to high you can't work there. You are over qualified.

My DW and I do enjoy their sweet tea. We always order four large sweet teas...... two of them with no ice!!! They always have to inform us which ones are the ones without ice either by marking them or telling us!!!! I always want to tell them thanks for telling us we would never have figured that out if they hadn't!!!!
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:22 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by mackman1994 View Post
And these are people are our future!!! There is no way this is going to turn out well.
I would suggest that perhaps you're being a bit too cynical here.

Yes these types are part of our future,but IMO they are greatly outnumbered by smart kids with questioning minds and common sense who are more intelligent with all the Internet options they have today.

Just look at the teenagers going nuts over the Beatles back then - probably the same thing was said about them by their elders,but they turned out OK.

Each generation had/has their idiots,but also had/has their bright stars.
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:25 AM   #12
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Just look at the teenagers going nuts over the Beatles back then - probably the same thing was said about them by their elders,but they turned out OK.

Are you sure? I believe some of them are here ....
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:25 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by B47 View Post
I would suggest that perhaps you're being a bit too cynical here.

Yes these types are part of our future,but IMO they are greatly outnumbered by smart kids with questioning minds and common sense who are more intelligent with all the Internet options they have today.

Just look at the teenagers going nuts over the Beatles back then - probably the same thing was said about them by their elders,but they turned out OK.

Each generation had/has their idiots,but also had/has their bright stars.
I know where you are coming from B47. It is just to bad that the Idiots seem to stand out more than the bright stars.
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:27 AM   #14
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Are you sure? I believe some of them are here ....
Well we do have our share of people here who simply haven't grown up or refuse to.
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:32 AM   #15
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"Some of the most interesting people I know are retired & still don't know what they want to be when they grow up........"


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Old 12-16-2013, 10:33 AM   #16
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"Some of the most interesting people I know are retired & still don't know what they want to be when they grow up........"


And you got a problem with that?
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:46 AM   #17
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These..... both true.


I called the local car quest parts store the other day and wanted to order a part.
"Jim" asked what he could do for me?
I said id like to order a "kats" brand 2.5" lower radiator hose heater.
"Jim" replied whats it fit ?
I giggled a bit and said a 2.5" hose.
"Jim" paused then said .... no what kind of car ?
I said it doesnt matter what it fits I just want a 2.5" lower radiator hose heater.
"Jim" slow to reply say ... yeah we dont have that unless you know what it fits.

I hung up.
Ps the store manager called me an hour later stating he was sorry and he'd send one out.
I said naaa I ordered one from napa and have it installed already.......


Few weeks back I called O'Reillys.

I'd like to order an alternator for a 1994 gmc k2500 5.7 with air and no air pump.

"Bill" what year was that?
1994
"Bill" 1/2 ton or 3/4 ton ?
3/4 ton
"Bill" 2 or 4 wheel drive ?

Click................
I gave him every shred of anything he needed in my first 30 seconds of the call.

Napa delivered it 20 minutes later.

True stories from turbs
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:49 AM   #18
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Originally Posted by f1100turbo View Post
These..... both true.


I called the local car quest parts store the other day and wanted to order a part.
"Jim" asked what he could do for me?
I said id like to order a "kats" brand 2.5" lower radiator hose heater.
"Jim" replied whats it fit ?
I giggled a bit and said a 2.5" hose.
"Jim" paused then said .... no what kind of car ?
I said it doesnt matter what it fits I just want a 2.5" lower radiator hose heater.
"Jim" slow to reply say ... yeah we dont have that unless you know what it fits.

I hung up.
Ps the store manager called me an hour later stating he was sorry and he'd send one out.
I said naaa I ordered one from napa and have it installed already.......


Few weeks back I called O'Reillys.

I'd like to order an alternator for a 1994 gmc k2500 5.7 with air and no air pump.

"Bill" what year was that?
1994
"Bill" 1/2 ton or 3/4 ton ?
3/4 ton
"Bill" 2 or 4 wheel drive ?

Click................

Napa delivered it 20 minutes later.

True stories from turbs
So I guess the moral of your stories is just call your local NAPA store next time you need an car/truck part.
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:50 AM   #19
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Originally Posted by f1100turbo View Post
These..... both true.


I called the local car quest parts store the other day and wanted to order a part.
"Jim" asked what he could do for me?
I said id like to order a "kats" brand 2.5" lower radiator hose heater.
"Jim" replied whats it fit ?
I giggled a bit and said a 2.5" hose.
"Jim" paused then said .... no what kind of car ?
I said it doesnt matter what it fits I just want a 2.5" lower radiator hose heater.
"Jim" slow to reply say ... yeah we dont have that unless you know what it fits.

I hung up.
Ps the store manager called me an hour later stating he was sorry and he'd send one out.
I said naaa I ordered one from napa and have it installed already.......


Few weeks back I called O'Reillys.

I'd like to order an alternator for a 1994 gmc k2500 5.7 with air and no air pump.

"Bill" what year was that?
1994
"Bill" 1/2 ton or 3/4 ton ?
3/4 ton
"Bill" 2 or 4 wheel drive ?

Click................
I gave him every shred of anything he needed in my first 30 seconds of the call.

Napa delivered it 20 minutes later.

True stories from turbs
Most parts stores surely are not what they used to be. This can get to be just a tad bit irritating.
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Old 12-16-2013, 10:53 AM   #20
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Originally Posted by mackman1994 View Post
And these are people are our future!!! There is no way this is going to turn out well.
And many of them are picketing for higher wages.
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