What a rhetorical statement. You know we are interested. Lol
It was probably much funnier if you were there, but here goes.
Like many towns, a US highway passes through, which was supplanted by an interstate highway in the 60's and 70's. As tends to happen in those cases, there's a 3 or 4 mile stretch north of town that has approximately 457 used car dealerships.
Back in the early 2000s, my wife and I decided one evening to start thinking about buying a pickup. We weren't in a position to buy new back then, but figured we could pick up a decent used one for $3k-$4k (back when you could buy a decent used truck for that).
One evening we headed up to "used car row" and drove up one side and down the other, stopping to browse wherever there seemed to be a likely candidate. At one place they had a truck that I was interested in, but they wanted me to come back in an hour to test drive it. We made the "appointment" and continued down the road.
At another nearby lot, they had a '94 or '95 GMC 2500. It was a long bed regular cab 2WD & had about 165k on the odometer. It also had mounting holes from a 5th wheel hitch in the bed. The price on the window was $9,995.
A sales guy came out while I was looking at it and I asked him if the price was a mistake - nearly 200,000 miles on a 7 year old truck was a lot more in 2001 than it is today, and I mentioned that I would be pretty concerned about the transmission if many of those miles had happened towing a 5th wheel.
He said that it was absolutely the correct price, that this truck was in high demand, had *never* towed a trailer - 5th wheel or otherwise - and the price was completely in line with KBB Value. I told him that I had been researching trucks just like that for weeks, and his price was high by at least 100% - especially with those miles.
For context, I probably would have driven it home right then at $4,000 or even $,4500.
He offered to take me into the office and pull up the KBB value right then, but I was kind of annoyed at that point and also needed to get back for the other test drive.
I told him that I needed to take off for half an hour, but I would come back immediately after my drive, and if he could show me that truck being worth 10 grand on the KBB website, I would buy it on the spot with no questions. He said that when I got back he would show me print outs from KBB, NADAGuide and others.
So, I go off and drive the other truck. I didn't like it, so I went back even though I had pretty much decided that the GMC had way too many red flags and the sales guy had kind of gotten under my skin.
There wasn't anyone out on the lot when I got back, so I walked into the showroom. The sales guy came out of an office and seemed to not recognize me at first. He asked if he could help me and I told him that I was back to look at the comparables that he said he was going to look up, and maybe buy that truck. He got that "Oh, sh!t" look in his eyes and said said that they were back in the office & he would go grab them.
I don't think he realized that I could see him while he was at his desk, but I could - and I saw that he had sat down and immediately started frantically typing on his computer. Clearly he had not verified the price like he said he would.
I leaned into the office and told him to never mind, I dang sure wasn't going to buy anything from him if he's going to screw me around and waste my time. Dude completely lost it. Started screaming obscenities at me, said *I* was wasting *his* time. I told him that he had lied to me outside about the truck, lied to me about looking up the pricing, and was probably going to lie to me about something else, too.
He started screaming "GET OUT!!! GET OUT!!! GET OUT!!!"
Good enough for me, I headed for the door.
As I pulled the door open to go out into the lot I heard "DON"T EVER COME BACK!!!!" right as one of those styrofoam carry-out boxes hit the window next to my head and splattered refried beans, Mexican rice, and burrito all over the glass, the floor, and to a lesser extent - me.
My wife had waited in the car during all of this, thinking I was just going to be in and out - so all she saw was Mexican leftovers exploding on the window as I opened the door.
As I got in the car, before she could say anything, I said "You're never going to believe what just happened....."
))))Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, which weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.What did she think I had an elephant?So because I'm retired and have little to do,on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again.I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to Pee on a Fire Hydrant and a car hit me,
